I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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