I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Well my sources tell me she just happens to appear in an episode girls gone wild.
I know someone that will spend hours looking for her. He also has many of said movies. And I will do it for free!
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
