is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
She can drink whiskey without a chaser and has a fridge full of whipped cream. Girlfriend potential
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
This chick just walked by and pet my beard. Don't know, never talked to her. She just walked by and pet my beard.
Marry her
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
You thought the flashing lights were strobe lights when they were loading you into the ambulance. You asked the EMT if he had any X.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
