there is a priest convention in the hotel. i feel like god is laughing at me.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
Let's put a bunch of beers in a backpack and shotgun them in a Red Lobster bathroom
We got signed out of jail by an Uber driver. I think that qualifies as a great first night of college
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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