this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
So adding to the list of things my boobs can do, sweeping with a broom is apparently a thing.
Ya know. I was thinking of my slutty moments the other day and finally know which one makes the number 1 spot.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Randomize
