thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Use "feeling words"
Yay
If our sexual relationship was relative to the Harry Potter series, I would have claimed the Wizard's Cup at least ten times.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
Randomize
