you were crying and the really sympathetic homeless man offered you a sip of his whiskey. who was i to stop you?
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
This is the high leading the old right now
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
I signed the divorce papers. Can I get a blowjob now?
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Hot guy next to me on the flight lives near my grandparents. There’s a 100% chance I end up drunk and naked in his hot tub
Happy Thanksgiving to me!!!
Randomize
