Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I wish i could go to google and type in drug dealers and it would bring up a number, a product and direction
You may have noticed the broken smoke detector and melted carpet. We may have accidentally lit a ping pong ball on fire...I'm sorry, but we did our best.
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
How hard is it to grasp the concept of 'I lost an impromptu saber bout and so I have to make a macaroni map of Soviet Russi, including Kazicstan'!?
He played me Kanye.. Speaking my love language.. He got a well deserved BJ
After last night I am convinced that you are the human embodiment of alcoholism and bad decisions.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Oh yeah I meant to tell you the Tomb Raider looking girl so crop dusted me on the stairway
Randomize
