Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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