The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
If is anything like my past relationships, I have no doubt that I will single-handedly reignite the Cold War
You need to fuck him. The man has his own Wikipedia.
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
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