she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
So how exactly do I backtrack from motorboating and ass grabbing?
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Just got thrown out of the club for making condom water balloons. I'm not ashamed.
Randomize
