I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
We're looking for the removeable roof from her Miata. Winner gets a 40.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
That car ride home was pretty awkward. Your feeling up the girlfriend to the guy who's throwing up out the window. Thanks for that.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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