Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
I just saw a guy in a zippo shirt buy 2 gallons of fire starter fluid and then proceed to smoke a cigarette. I feel like hes got some big plans for his tuesday.
Please stop calling me a pterodactyl during sex. It only happens when you're drunk, but still.
Randomize
