threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
It's like salsa. But with balls in it. I like to call it balsa
And then. You beer bonged 3 tall boys. In a row. Fell into some kids lap. And pulled down my shirt trying to get up. Thank you for that. I got laid
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
