I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
CONGRATS VODKA, YOU WON RHIS TIME..
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I woke up naked wrapped in my roommate's towel with one leg shaved and money thrown all over the room. Happy 21st birthday.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
Fuck. I think I can already feel tomorrow's hangover. It's like future me cane back to warn present me about the impending doom but didn't turn the time dial back far enough.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
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