Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Your "dubstep at ceilis" resulted in a random naked guy busting into my room and peeing all over my bathroom
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
