Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
Saved a life and got us a free vacuum cleaner (and learned vacuum is not spelled "vacumn"). Get on my level.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
An we can hold bottles of vodka in our hands singing yo ho a pirates life for me
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Nutrition teacher wants anything i eat or drink documented for the week including dancefestopia. Do you know the recommended daily ammount of psylicybin or MDMA?
Aaaaaaand, there's the title of my second book. "One Dick. Six Angles."
Well thank god i want six autographed copies
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
You dove at him but passed out mid dive. Shame it wasnt a costume party your superman suit wouldve been clutch in the situation
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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