Even water is tasting like jack daniels
Great. Me and the intoxalock guy are getting so close he just said "alright see you later girl!" when I called about getting the blower recallibrated.
The liquor store manager told us to drink responsible as we checked out and we laughed to his face. Like we're buying karkov at noon, responsibility is out of the question
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I'm gonna call it the Reunion Tour. Hooked up with two different ex girlfriends in one day...
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
Yeah if I don't text back. I'm eating. sleeping. Or lifting. Or drinking. Or playing call of duty. Like shit man
masturbating on the freeway is more stressful than it sounds
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
