Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
how bad would it be if i made his twitter my home page?
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
If I hid at school to avoid the cops, is it fleeing and evading or just being a good student?
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
Randomize
