Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
i just called. the lady was really nice. something tells me my schools clinic gets a lot of calls about chlamydia
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Do me a favor. Next time I think it's a good idea to take pulls from the handle, yell "FALCON PUNCH" and uppercut me in the taint. My future liver thanks you.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Clothes make me feel like a responsible adult and that's just not something I'm ready to handle.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
So I'm buying milk, bread, yogurt & lube. Not awkward at all
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