i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
Want to get drunk and look at an xray of my dick?
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
Jenn from HR called him the new office boy toy. I think I need to bathe in bleach.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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