in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
Randomize
