only you would photoshop your dick
Fuck. That. I'm gonna get drunker and make them regret they EVER put me at the kids table. I'm a MAN.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
I'm going out w/ her for her b-day in a bit. I just talked to one of her drunk friends on the phone who asked if I could "handle 7 lesbian." This could be interesting.
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
He's basically me if I was an 8-yr-old boy. It's like looking into a pudgy terrifying mirror
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I just noticed that pic of your cock has a Christmas tree in the background. It's July.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
