actually, I'm a sock model
if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
id say I'm a pretty good fuck buddy, i didn't even booty call him on his girlfriends birthday
He referred to our sex as being similar to "Two cheetahs cage fighting" and I have to agree.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
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