Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
I wanna get so fucked up that I try to catch a coyote in a pillowcase, breakdance fight a lion, and send back some toast at Denny's when I see its slightly burnt.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
Hey. Be honored that I consider you the genital expert. I know alot of candidates for the position.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
