Yeah, i don't remember peeing. or meeting the girl.
it was like the sexual equivalent of when Wilson fell off the raft and floated away
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
I woke up not knowing what state I was in. Turns out, people from Deleware are pretty helpful.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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