I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Someone just got kicked out of the mall for being dressed like a giant cat. I feel like this is in your future.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
dude, im taking a shit and i just realized it's his MOM in the shower not him...oh fuck
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Randomize
