Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
i think ive crossed the line from sexually frustrated to sexually furious
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Randomize
