It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
last night i was so high that when a homeless person asked me for a dollar, i responded: dolla dolla bill ya'll.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
Randomize