You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
nothing says "we're all in this together" like the herpes she passed around to our entire group of friends
He showed me one of his balls and said "this one's free. you'll have to work to see the other.."
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize