just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
We're friends with people in his circle of friends so we're half way in. It's like I've already given him a hand job.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Randomize