Please forgive me. I will pay for your emergency room visit.
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I fucked him twice and then he set me up with his teammate. This kid does wonders for me
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
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