I then asked the hardee's employee: mam, do you mind if i pay 75 cents in cash and then put the 1.13 on my debit card.
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I feel like I shouldn't have to explain to you why giving your cat weed was a bad idea.
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Is "head down ass up" an appropriate way to say good morning?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
Randomize
