I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
Update: I just puked into a sock. It was the only thing available at the time. Why I happened to be holding a sock, we may never know.
Like my mouth was on his pelvis connected to his balls that's how far it was
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Do you think county jail has a Groupon?
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
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