lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
Her eyebrows were plucked so thin that she had to have gonorrhea. Clean girls just don't pluck that way
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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