she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
I started to trust fall random people on the dance floor
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
i chased my gummy vitamins with cold bacon, never say I don't take care of myself
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
Randomize
