You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
You told the entire smokers deck that you were blowing .08 now and anyone else willing later
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
I like her because we want the same things out of life AND she actually wants to have sex with me.
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
