I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
In case you were unaware playing with rabbits on ecstasy is the greatest thing ever. I feel like I'm ODing on adorable right now.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Favor? Can you not wear as much glitter on your face this time? Walking in the house looking like a disco ball was enough embarrassment for the week 😒
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
