ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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