Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Yeah I'm a responsible adult man but I legally unbind myself from anything that occurred that evening and am in no way responsible for those actions.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
Had sex in a blanket fort. How was your weekend?
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Can we throw a "death to my 20s" party when I turn 30?
Sure. Funeral attire and hard liquor
Randomize
