He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
almost passed out on the way to class today.. laid down in a construction site. bad idea
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
I love you. Happy valentines. Satin Patricks dayyyyyyyyyy. Alreadythrew up. Geeeeerait.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
How would your parents feel if we installed a sex swing?
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
I have blood and BBQ sauce all over my shirt. I blame you for the blood.
Randomize
