was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Any time before 12:00pm. Can go fuck itself.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
the point i decided it was time to leave was when i was on the floor of the bar, after taking her down with me, and a table.
Yea idk it was like early in the morning and you were walking around with no shoes carrying a printer
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
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