I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
I just made what I can safely estimate to be a 900 calorie pb&j. Fuck a serving size.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
Randomize
