it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
ugh. my friday night is playin' Farmville on my face. time to harvest the blackheads...
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
Randomize
