Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
We must be getting old. All of our friends are having kids and they aren't illegitimate.
Semen is not good for contacts.
You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
Randomize
