Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
What's the point of bringing a Jack and Coke to work if my boss is just gonna piss and moan about me day drinking again?
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
I think we ended 5-7 relationships as well this weekend...so another good stat
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
welp, we watched the human centipede high last night and my mind literally shut down, when i came to all i could hear was mel saying EAT EAT HIS SHIT
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
Randomize
