Do you think there are girls out there that really do like small penis?
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Lol it's kinda hilarious. I left missing one glass... guage. I feel like Cinderella... but less classy.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
