Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
i love marijuana more then i could love a human baby.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
After he came inside me, he made us hold hands and pray that I wasn't pregnant.
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
She got called into work early but she left me a note that had directions to her roommates stash of weed on top of a two bacon and egg mcmuffins. I think I win.
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
It was bitter sweet because I woke him up with sex but then I peed in his bed with him in it
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Randomize
