i would punch a child for taco bell
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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