South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
I just paid for weed by taking him to the store to buy cheese so he could make empanadas. Best. Drug deal. Ever.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Damn it. Can't order pizza. Can't do the hot tub. No one to invite over for loud, kinky sex. What's the point of being here alone?!
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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